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Lmbeene
09-07-2007, 02:10 PM
I guess I'm dumb but I'm starting to figure out some things about this parenting deal.

For instance, I'v had these revelations recently. They are simple and straight forward but I am tired and new to living in a foreign country so I am slow, I guess, that or I am in the 14th trimester or some such and I can't think clearly...bwa ha ha.

1. I am not going to experience everything that my boys experience. WHAT? I am used to being in their "classroom" or in the back of the room at Sunday School and I'm not always going to know what they know. I'm not going to know the words to the songs that they hum in the back of the car, not always. ZINGGGG, parental revelation.

2. These boys are not going to be raised where or how I was raised. I'm sure that you are proud of where you were raised and the traditions that accompany that childhood as am I. DUH, my boys are not going to be southern boys. I am their only link to the deep south, me and the three weeks that I spend with them at my parents' home every summer. These are not going to be southern boys. ZINGGG, parental revelation.

3. These boys are not doing this arguing and fussing and irrational "I don't want my milk in THAT cup, I want it in another cup" to make me mad, to get my goat, to throw me over the patientless edge. It's not something that they do to terrorize me on purpose. They are children. ZINGGGG...parental revelation.

Anyone have something to add?

Laura

ziggyeor
09-07-2007, 03:36 PM
The throw down fit, head banging on the floor is not a reflection of my teaching... they're just almost 2 http://forum.startascrapbook.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif (have to put teaching since I'm not there parent)

Monkey see monkey do. One child does it and the other has to try even though they're smaller or have a lid on their cup. Two of my kids are using cups with out lids and the others have sippy cups so one w/o lid was dunking her cookies and the others were trying to do it too http://forum.startascrapbook.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif It was so funny because one did it with each cookie just touching the lid of the cup even though he wasn't getting it wet http://forum.startascrapbook.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif

Children are 1 to 2 they will not always use their words and "ouch, biting hurts!" doesn't fully register in there little minds http://forum.startascrapbook.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_razz.gif

Ziggy

LoriS.
09-08-2007, 07:07 AM
Who says that the well know classic can't be referred to as "Snow White and the little dorks"? (No lie my 4yo dd insists)

But on a more serious note Laura what you are experiencing is seperation anxiety lol, actually though it really is kind of like that, coming to the realization that they are seperate people from you. It is sobering to think of those things as a parent, it is also important to remember that although there might be some things you wish for them that can't be, there are others that you are making possible that might not ever occurred. You night not ever know how those experiences helped them become the grown-ups they will be but you will know that they did. Life is about change. I think that some people think that staying in one place their entire life means that things will be the same and it provides comfort. But when you think about it life is still about change even if you never cross the state line. Now back to my normal sarcastic self... it is perfectly reasonable to suddenly without notice or any indication whatsoever have a different favorite color cup and you as the all knowing mother should have somehow been psychically aware of that fact!

Lmbeene
09-08-2007, 02:54 PM
Lori, you're so crazy. I love it. Yes, I should have known and then I should have known that they wanted each other's cups but they wanted their original milk back...just switch the cups and not the milk. Then Little Bit tried to pour from one vessel to another and cried ...get this...over spilt milk. OH I crack myself up on that one.

lb

javamom
09-08-2007, 03:09 PM
Oh Laura- that was a good one! You'll make yourself crazy my dear trying to give them your childhood- I had that revelation at some point too, but sadly it didn't deter as much as it probably should have. LOL. Which is why I am crazier than I aught to be.

DD Sarah wil be 24 at the end of the month and DD Rachel is 20, and I still wonder if I/we gave them enough great memories and just about that time one of them will say "hey, I remember when you and Dad did ____with us, or we went to____________, or that time we played ______ all together...

So it's not where you are - it's what you do with them and the funny silly, things that happen along the way.

You are doing one thing I can't go back & do Laura- you are getting marvelous pics of everything and visually saving those memories!

jujuann
09-08-2007, 04:57 PM
Laura, my DD and DS are "military brats" also. DD is 40 with 2 DS's and DS is 33 with one DS. Both of them got my southern values, but with a better knowledge of how to get along with others than I could have given them growing up in my hometown. They have excellent memories of moving from state to state and the areas and people they got to know. They have lived on both coasts and the midwest. Each was born in a different state and neither was born in my home state. They are more tolerant of others differences than most people, and especially the handicapped. Those are the things you are giving your children. Being a military child is an education in itself. So as they grow and become their own person, remember, you'll hear yourself as they become parents. I do often and am amazed that they actually were listening when I talked to them and as I showed them how I believed you should live your life. So take heart. Remember the memories so when they remind you, it'll be a shared memory.

And as Christi said, take tons of photos. I didn't get as many as I now wish I had. Be sure to get photos of each place you live in. I had to take trips to get ones for my kids. They want them so they can show their kids.

I don't know why, but my two developed a greater sense of family than many their age. It may have been the infrequent trips to visit family. So your trips to your home are important too.

So enjoy them. They're only young once!!

laurat99
09-10-2007, 06:04 AM
lb--Sanity is just around the corner! I heard once that most people's style of parenting is either a direct reflection of how their parents did it, or the complete opposite, if it wasn't so good. Just keep on instilling your Southern values to them, and if that doesn't work, sweet tea!